“active listening” perfected

10May08

So, we learn in 15.280 (Communication for Managers) that we should be practicing “active listening” at all times.  Active listening is the act of not only actually paying attention to the listener – quite a feat at times – but also demonstrating that you are indeed listening.  Sometimes this takes the form of “mm hmm” incessantly, *nodding* frenetically, *smiling* awkwardly, or plain ol’ feigning intrigue.

I contend that many guys are masters of this skills based on certain, let’s call them, “environmental” surroundings.  However, we can be sometimes confused with, what I call, “pretentious know-it-all listeners”.  The ones who waste precious Q&A period time with guest speakers by combining all of the above forms – at 120% of normal use – just to let the speaker and everyone else in the room know that they already know what’s about to be said.  *deep breath*  Yes, you all know what I mean.

That said, today, I’ve taken this to a whole new level.  A level where active listening is so well tuned that the conversation starts, continues, and finishes.  All without needing any conscious attention.

Context: Walking down Park Ave South towards a closed section of road filled with food and random merchandise vendors.  The perfect storm.

Conversation:

• Her: “Look!  Funnel cakes!”
• Me: “Mm hmm.”
• Her: “Have you ever had a funnel cake?”
• Me: <smile>
• Her: “I haven’t.”
• Me: <nod>
• Her: “Ooooo falafels.  I’m gonna get one.”

Calories burned: ZERO.

Filed under: Life, New York   |  1 Comment
Tags: active listening, falafels, funnel cakes, park ave, walking